I've gotta feeling

I put a lot of stock in signs and feelings. Probably too much, considering how logical I otherwise tend to be. But you know...so far it works out pretty well...

:-*

coworker: "I don't mind not kissing anyone, because I think that there's a lot that goes into kissing, a lot of complicated emotions, and it means a lot to me."

me: "yeah, I used to believe all that Prince Charming stuff, but all but one of the guys I've ever kissed have been just random guys at bars or parties, so it hasn't meant anything to me in a while."

all but one

sweetie, you're coming up on Summer 2010. two years. get over it.




(nb: it's not HIM i can't get over. clearly. it's the situation--that that's the ONLY semi-normal romantic relationship i've ever been involved in...i just find it kind of depressing.)

Happy Easter!

The mom of one of my students invited me to Easter dinner--which was particularly awesome since I had been despairing of being alone. Actually, at the instant when she called to invite me, I was making myself pokemon kraft macaroni and cheese and thinking, "man, for Easter dinner I'm gonna be eating leftover pokemon macaroni." I was soooo touched that she thought of me, though! :) lovemyjob, lovemykids it was so funny, when my student first saw me he had a huge smile on his face, and then in a split second it changed to this huge "wtf" face...hehehe. But we had a great meal, and I helped hide easter eggs, and then I helped my kiddo find easter eggs... :)

Today was such a beautiful day. It's even easier to be joyful on Easter sunday when it is so nice out! hehehe.

in other news, I didn't have time to clean joe jonesie's cage this morning, and it smells to high heaven. consequences. hahaha

Internet dreamz

I had a dream last night that a friend (I honestly don't remember who) and an ex were trying to get me to do a threesome with them. :-S The main part I remember is him asking, "come on, Marie, why not?" and me responding with, "um, well, you BROKE my HEART" which is kind of strange because I don't really use that phrase--and you'd think my first reason would have been that we had never gone that far. But then he kissed me and it felt like our first weekend together when everything was perfect. I woke up then but if I hadn't I would have done anything he asked.

(I've spent the last year and a half mostly-subconsciously trying to recreate the way I felt that weekend. I've never even come close. So it was nice, I guess, to dream about it.)

In other news, I just facepalmed really hard at a photo of the Irish guy that popped up on my newsfeed. If I didn't have four friends to vouch for the noises they heard, I'd be pretty certain that never actually happened, heh. #alcohol #woo #mantherewerealotofpeopleinouraptthatnight #ohmygodthatwasonlyayearago

Confessions of a Springfield Single Gal

Background: so our church hires police officers to come hang out during the service, one in uniform in the back lobby and one in plainclothes to sit in the front row. Miss Meme hangs out in the choir loft, whether singing or violining.

Today, from my perch in the front row of the choir loft, I noticed something. The plainclothes cop was really hot. I may have stared. I may have lusted. Worse things have happened. I felt a little bad, but I felt a lot worse when, after the service, I was TOTALLY BUSTED.

The music minister--who, during the sermon, sits in the same front corner as the cop--came up to me and asked if I know the security guard guy. "um...no?" I mumble, realizing I've been caught. "I thought you were looking at me at first, but then I realized you were looking at him." "um...yeah...he's...a cutie" I trail off, dying of embarrassment. The music minister asked if I wanted him to introduce me, but I decline, as I realize how OBVIOUS I had been.

Tra la, pack up my violin, call Erica over and tell her my tale, start to head out, and the music minister catches me again. "He's getting married," he discloses. "Aw, too bad" I mumble, still pretty embarrassed...but at the same time amazed that this 40- or 50-something man did that kind of detective work* for me!!! Freaking awesome. I mean, seriously! I mean, I realize that his helpfulness probably springs from the archaic expectation that a good Baptist girl must be married off as soon as possible (see also how the next Sunday School class up after "college" is "young marrieds"), but still.

(You know, that married-off-as-soon-as-possible thing itself probably stems from good ol' young-folks horniness. Better to get married and do it than be single and do it.)

*I'm lolling at the music minister doing detective work on a cop for me.

My life is so ridiculous.

I love it.

Disturbing disney dilemma

Fact:
I haven't watched near enough Disney movies lately.

Actually, I haven't watched ANY Disney movies lately.

Actually, I never fuckin' saw the Princess and the Frog, and it's out on video now, so what's my excuse??? I mean, that movie was marketed to me. Specifically. The previews starting out with Aladdin, Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast, Lion King, basically my childhood. And the prince is soooooo handsome--Disney's hottest prince since Aladdin! And it's Disney's first black princess! And I can't wait for some fresh Disney meat to chew up from a feminist perspective!

I've been feeling like watching Snow White lately. Which is odd because I never really liked that one--actually, I never really gave it a chance because her voice bugs me. I guess I could buy it and watch it. I have a habit of buying these movies and never watching them (see also: Pinocchio, Oliver and Company, Dumbo, several others).

i'm wishing (i'm wishing)
for the one i love (for the one i love)
to find me (to find me)
today (today)
i'm hoping (i'm hoping)
and i'm dreaming of (and i'm dreaming of)
the nice things (the nice things)
he'll say (he'll say)
tell me, wishing well
will my wish come true,
will my wish come with your magic spell
won't you tell my loved one what to do?

I also hardcore feel like listening to some Disney On the Record (a broadway show of disney medleys, basically, kind of dumb but i saw it at starlight FRONT ROW CENTER and it was EPIC, I mean when the chick was singing "part of your world" she was making EYE CONTACT WITH ME AND ASKING ME, "what do you call it?") (lolol) (that actress now plays Mary Poppins on Broadway), but i took that cd out of my car at some point and it seems like a lot of effort to find it on my ipod, turn off shuffle, etc. hahaha

I should go to bed. Stop whining about my disney dilemma. Can't actually do anything about it at the moment--bedtime--but I can wish! LOL

A few things.

1. It strikes me that it was possibly a Poor Choice to begin to listen to the Hush Sound again (first time in months and months) at the same time as I'm weaning myself off antidepressants. LOL

2. I met a new student today! I have him after school for an hour a couple times a week, and when there is an opening in my class he will move to that spot (probably Julyish). We had an amazing first session! He cried one time, when--wait for it--HE WAS LEAVING! ^_^

3. It's really cold in my room right now. Tomorrow's supposed to be really cold. Wtf I thought it was spring!

4. So I'm leaving for KC immediately after school tomorrow, and I just realized that I haven't packed at all. I haven't been there since Christmas :-x and I have a lot of junk to get rid of, hehe (namely heavy coats, stuff I want my mom to mend, etc).

5. Catherine Zeta-Jones might be the most beautiful person alive.