All riled up

There are certain things about Southern Baptist dogma--not about God, but just some applications--that I do not believe in. The two easiest examples: Abortion=killing babies and should be outlawed. Homosexuality=a sinful choice. Usually it's just Pat Robertson, for example, going off on that stuff, which is easy for me to ignore; when I do occasionally encounter it in my daily life, it really upsets me. I can't reconcile my beliefs about a loving God with conservative condemnation.

In Sunday School today there was some ranting (yelling, honestly) about the evils of abortion. The lesson was about moral relativism. I wanted to say, "you know what, I don't think anyone is relativistic when it comes to abortion. to ME, having the option is RIGHT, and denying it is WRONG, actually." but I mean of course I couldn't say that. and the teacher was, of course, dismissing any sort of argument as folly. I realize that when it comes to abortion most everyone is either firmly one way or firmly the other, and it's a difficult conversation to have, but it deeply bothers me to be yelled at along the lines of, "people are going to different countries to adopt babies, and we're murdering them here!"

1. You're a MAN, and as such could never be in a situation where you have to make that decision. Fuck off.
2. How do you know none of the women in the room have had an abortion? The statistics are very, very high. even if you consider abortion evil, which is your prerogative, you shouldn't go around making well-meaning women who made a mistake feel like shit. everyone fucking makes mistakes.

Sure, of course, a woman could carry the baby to term and give it up for adoption. All sorts of couples want to adopt brand-new babies and leave those older kids in foster care. but what if she doesn't want to go through A) the physical stress and B) the social stress*? oh, you say, it serves her right, it's what she gets for having sex. WELL, WHAT DOES THE MAN GET FOR HAVING SEX? ZERO CONSEQUENCES. ZERO FUCKING CONSEQUENCES, for being [at least!] equally guilty. So why should the woman have to suffer?

(*I mean, the woman who gives the child up for adoption would probably be alienated from, say, church. You wouldn't fucking praise her for being brave and carrying the child--you would fucking judge her for having sex outside of marriage.)

and I would think this is too obvious to even mention, but if you DID outlaw abortion, you wouldn't get rid of the motivation. Women would get them illegally and dangerously, and then not only would embryos be dying left and right, but so would women.

augh

it just really, really hurts me when things get...well...Baptist in a conversation about morality. if he had started to talk about homosexuality, as I was afraid he would, I would have HAD to have said something. Which then would have alienated ME from my new Sunday School class. Nice going, Sunday School teacher!

I love church. and I loved the rest of the lesson. I just can't handle being yelled at about the evil-ness of something that I 100% believe should be available, without there being an option for rational discussion. I mean, there's Sanctity of Human Life Sunday every year, and I've never been offended by the sermons. I always expect that I will be, but the pastor handles the topic very respectfully.

(Choose your own conclusion!)

Graceful ending:
There's a difference between valuing life and condemning sinners.

Bitter ending:
There's a difference between valuing life and condemning sinners--ahem--FELLOW sinners. Don't fucking think you're any better. All sins are equal in God's eyes, you'd know that if you read the Bible you beat people with.

If you made a mistake, wouldn't you do whatever you could to get your life back on track?

It starts in my toes...

I'm being haunted the song "Bubbly" by Colbie Caillat. How else do you explain it?

Background: the song's a good two or three years old, and not anything I'd ever actually LISTENED to. My roommates spring of junior year, the music therapy girls, would play it on their guitars from time to time, and that was really my only exposure to it--their nervous chattering of "tee hee it's actually about an ORGASM," all that. I didn't really care. Not really my type of music--a little too mellow, a lot too lovey-dovey.

Story: A couple weeks ago my car cd player broke, so I've been listening to the radio on drives too short to bust out the iPod. Meanwhile, two weekends ago I ended things with my first serious boyfriend. Two or three days after that all occurred, "Bubbly" came on the radio just as I turned on my car to drive to work. I listened to it out of curiosity--as I said, all I knew was the "tee hee, orgasm" thing--and, WOW, it was depressing.

the rain is falling on my window pane
but we are hiding in a safer place
under covers staying dry and warm
you give me feelings that I adore

'cause, like, the first night we were together that weekend, before I knew that I had to end it, it was all stormy...and we didn't leave the bed his apartment...

About a week later (also known as a few days ago), the song came on AGAIN on my drive to work. Here's how it went: I listened to the intro, was reminded of "Bubbly," but thought, "noooo, as old as that song is, there's no way they're playing it at the exact same time two times in a week!", but, yeah, no, that was it. I switched stations and didn't give it another thought...

...Until today. I was listening to that same station (the main Top 40 station), and they were playing Taylor Swift, so I switched to my backup station. The backup station--how do I describe it? I always think it's alternative until I hear them playing Katy Perry or Christina Aguilera, but it's not exactly Top 40. Anyhow--THE BACKUP STATION WAS PLAYING "BUBBLY." I actually shouted, "are you fucking kidding me???" and switched back to Taylor Swift.

I mean, I honestly don't think I'd ever heard the song all the way through before (except for Carrie and Kristen's virginal renditions). And to hear it on the radio across stations 3 times in like 10 days? When I listen to the radio for 10 minutes a day, tops? And that this happened right after I'd ended actually being in a place where I could actually appreciate something that happy and sappy.

lol...